Day 5 (reality is a harsh mistress with an oak paddle)

Posted: March 26, 2011 in Uncategorized

I have come to the conclusion in the last week that my education is in dire need of upgrading, my body is in dire need of a good work-out routine and my love life is in dire need…well I just need a love life. Also I need a big fancy new laptop to compensate for my other shortcomings. I can’t buy a Camaro so more Ram will just have to do (any and all puns intended, baby).

Sadly, most of this is on hold waiting for the all important tax return from the government. The problem being I am not known for my patience so I am checking my accounts daily waiting for a wad of cash to appear like magic. In the mean time I am eating ichiban noodles for dinner and hiding in my apartment watching movies (cause at least that doesn’t require any money.) I may go to my parents tomorrow night for free food and laundry. I probably shouldn’t have to do that at this point in life but bite me, that 8gb ram upgrade isn’t going to pay for itself and my place charges $4 a load to do laundry. All the Dad’s Laundromat and Bistro requires is I play the ABSOLUTE WORST CARD GAME EVER and do a few dishes.Turns out that only after leaving do I realize how good I had it at home.

Still, the benefit of living on my own is I can type this up in the living room while wearing boxers. I suppose I could have done that while living back home but it would have lead to some awkwardness. Among other things my father never put curtains up in the living room. Every neighbor walking by would see me typing in my Haynes. 


Day 3 of my healthy life was a wash out. Ended up skipping lunch till 3pm when my friend took pity on me and ordered us up a pizza. As much as I felt bad for eating it, after opening and scanning and receiving a severe bum load of new iPads I was ready to resort to eating the bottle of mystery pickles in the back of the work fridge anyway.  To ease my guilt I bought a salad from Safeway for dinner. Not bad, had some chicken and cheese and for some reason corn in with it.

Day 4 was pretty good. Despite work deciding to lay out a large spread of pizza, chips, dip and cookies I managed to carve out 30 minutes in the day to walk to a Subway and get a salad instead. Wasn’t too bad either, I would have one from them again.

Day 5 went a little wild with a brunch out but in the end the food came to the table cold and wasn’t all that great anyway. So sort of a moral victory as I probably will find a better place for brunch next time, perhaps with some sort of healthy alternatives. Plus the meal will probably have to be all I get till dinner so if I top it off with a salad tonight it won’t be the worst thing I have done in a day.

Rancid Monke

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